When you win the lottery, YOU call the shots!

If you never heard about American etiquette writer Emily Post, you're not missing much. She told us how to hold your knife and fork correctly and what to wear to weddings.

For the majority of us in the 21st century it just doesn't matter any more.

However, many of us are still controlled by others:

• They tell us what car to buy (Consumer Magazine: "That car is too expensive /gas guzzling for you.")
• They tell us what to eat (Nutritionists: "Those hamburgers will make you fat.")
• They tell us when to pay taxes (IRS: "Your tax is due on the 7th, or else".)
• They tell us how much we can borrow (Big Bank: "Your credit is average, we can only lend you X amount.")
• They tell us how we can dress (Boss: "You can't wear a T-shirt in this office, wear a tie.")

Naturally, there are things you need to do when others tell you. It helps make our planet a better place to live:

- We all need to keep to the same side of the road.
- We all need to respect our neighbor's privacy.
- We shouldn't rob banks.

But when you win lotto, everything changes. And while you can tell you boss you will wear what you like (after you give in your notice!), or blow off the banks, there are more subtle pressures put on you.

Many winners get begging letters from strangers. And sometimes friendships change.

There is a small price to pay for your freedom, so you need to be strong... decide what you can give away or share, and stick to it.

Many winners have found that by tying their winnings up legally, they avoid the guilt that comes with not being able to spend it all on others.

• Some winners buy a new house or make a deposit on one. This means that money is simply not available to argue over.
• Other winners deposit their prize money in the bank for 6 months while they decide what to do with it.

By that time usually all the arguments are over, and everyone has a fair idea of what to expect from them.

Most winners have a great time with very few problems after they win. Remember to set the ground rules - YOU call the shots!